OMG! I AM still a teenager

So, the past couple of days I've found myself (internally [mostly (not counting the venting to my mom and Luke)]) freaking out about my high school reunion...again. Not that I'm going to get crap dumped on me, but more that it's going to be like high school.

I've been freaking out because I've seen classmates on facebook who are buying new dresses and my reaction (in order) is:

1. To wonder if this really is a high school dance and roll my eyes at their teen-like ways.
2. Feel sorry for myself because I don't have the money to go buy a new dress, make sure Luke has a coordinating tie, and order a boutonniere from Hy-Vee. And my old prom dress definitely won't fit (thank you, college years, for giving me boobs).

Both Luke and Mom have reminded me that no one will know if I'm wearing a repeat outfit or not. And honestly, I don't really have the desire to go buy a new outfit. But it's just the idea of all of it ("it" being the stress of finding the perfect outfit) feels way too much like high school.

Really, this is where 10 years of "adulthood" gets me!? Still freaking out about who I'll talk to and what I'll wear and whether or not my hair will behave itself...gah.

For some reason, Brittany Murphy's line from clueless just popped into my head..."You're a virgin who can't drive." Well, guess what, stupid high school Jill, you AREN'T a virgin and you CAN drive! So there!

My husband is as cool as me now

For those of you who have been around for awhile, you may remember this. Luke had a similar moment tonight that he wanted me to blog about. Here's his story...

We've been watching The Guild the past couple of nights. Tonight we ended on an episode where someone goes in for a high five and misses, and the other high-fiver says "Watch the elbow, Dude." According to Luke, he came up with that and he's really excited that his idea has made it onto The Guild. Then he said, "You need to blog about this."

Now, I'm pretty sure that I heard "watch the elbow" before I met Luke. Has anyone else heard this advice before? Or has Luke's idea made it big time (of course, not as big time as mine; mine was on network tv after all)?

Peeling fingers

Luke and I have both been experiencing dry, peeling fingers recently. We've come up with a few hypotheses as to why this is happening:

-sitting in a/c air constantly
-the change in season
-(and my personal favorite, from my husband) touching the hot steering wheel.

The day I learned the purpose of the parking brake

It was a nice spring day in the early 90s, I know that much for (almost) sure. Joe and I were spending the weekend, or maybe just the day, with our dad and he'd taken us to the Village of East Davenport, where he was playing baseball (or more likely catch) with our uncle at Lindsay Park. We'd gotten bored and asked if we could go sit in Dad's pick up.

We were both pretty young; Joe was probably only 5 or 6, making me only 9 or 10. Dad had a red S10 pickup from the mid-80s. It had a long vinyl bench seat and behind the seat was at least two years worth of Dad's garbage; mainly empty packages of chocolate covered peanuts and Diet Mountain Dew bottles. He's a carpenter so everything had a thin layer of dirt. It was a clutch and the way I remember it, Joe started playing with stick shift (maybe it was me, I don't really remember this part).

As a person who has owned a stick for most of my car-owning life, I've tried to figure out what happened next several times.

Dad had parked the car on a hill. It was facing downhill. I guess the truck was in gear when Dad had parked it, and Joe (or me, again, I don't really remember who was the instigator) must have put the car into neutral and we started moving down the hill (coming down into the river valley, so it was a fairly steep hill for Iowa). I remember being incredibly terrified and trying to figure out how we'd explain this to our Mom later in the day (I'm not sure she ever found out). I remember having no idea what was going on or how to stop it, except for trying to move the stick shift around some more.

And then I remember our uncle running from the ball field, across the street, and opening the drivers' side door of the truck and slamming on the parking brake.

I filed "parking brake" away for all future emergencies. And I decided not to wait in cars with my brother when I was bored.

I'm going to write

I'm going to write because I've been saying that I want to write for a long time. I think I might be good at it, and I have loads of free time. I don't know who I'm writing for, I don't know what I'm going to write. Well, that last part is kind of a lie. I've decided that this summer I'm finally going to write what I said I would about five years ago: a book about substitute teaching. (Think Baby-Sitters Club meets The Nanny Diaries.)

So, to pump myself up about this, I've been reading Anne Lamott's Bird by Bird. As I was reading this morning, I was struck by one of the things she has to say about plot:

I say don't worry about plot. Worry about the characters. Let what they say or do reveal who they are, and be involved in their lives, and keep asking yourself, Now what happens? The development of relationship creates plot.

I think that so much about this is true not only in writing, but in life. As I struggle to figure out what I am doing, how am I investing in relationship? How will these relationships I'm building now affect tomorrow? And as these relationships are built, how will that change the "plot" I'm on?

Maybe this writing thing will end up being more about figuring out who I am than anything else.

(I realize that this is somewhat cheesy. You don't have to tell me. I know. It's kind of who I am. Look at all of this self-realization already!)

High School Reunion

There's this episode of 30 Rock where Liz Lemon goes to her high school reunion even though she doesn't want to go because she was a nerd in high school. She characterizes herself as a "lonely nerd." Her boss, Jack Donaghy, convinces her to go to her reunion because, along with a great career, she has "found a hairstyle that works" for her "as long as it's not too humid."

Minus the great career, I feel a little bit like Liz Lemon when I think about my own high school reunion. It's this summer, in July actually. I wouldn't characterize my high school years as lonely and nerdy, but I definitely did not feel like I fit in with any particular group of people and look back at pictures of myself from high school and grimace because I was so incredibly awkward. (my brother got away with having about 6 months of awkwardness...I had about 6 years of awkwardness). If it wasn't for facebook, I doubt that I would be in contact with anyone from my high school. So, like Liz Lemon, I have found myself thinking, "I wouldn't have fun. I'm not going." Plus, I don't have a great career (although I have found a hairstyle that works for me as long as it's not too humid).

Liz and I both decided to go to our reunions. Now I'm a little worried that mine might turn out like Liz's. It turns out Liz wasn't a lonely nerd in high school. In fact, she was so much of a bully that people, including the Homecoming Queen, called her the White Haven Witch. I'm worried that I'm remembering my awkward teen years incorrectly, and instead of coming across as somewhat shy and nerdy, I was (possibly still am) aloof and judgmental.

Anyway, Luke and I have decided to go. At first we figured it would at least be a good chance to see my mom, but it turns out she might not even be around that weekend. So, I guess that weekend may be all about my awkward teenage years, since I tend to regress when I'm stressed out and I think this reunion is already stressing me out. Hopefully they don't try to dump crap on my head.

To all two people who read this (including my husband)

Life has been not-so-fun lately. Instead of depressing you (and myself) here are some good things that have happened recently:

1. I got a free ride back to Iowa last weekend. Emy was going up to see her family in the Quad-Cities and I got to hitch a ride with her.

2. Luke finished Mass Effect 2 last night, which means I probably have a full 24 more hours before he finds a new video game to be obsessed with.

3. There is green (and not weeds!) in my container garden. The spinach and lettuce is peaking out and in less time than the package said (I noticed at 6 days and it said 7-10)!

4. Curtains have been hung in both bedrooms and our living room.

5. I took our recycling to the recycling center today. That's right. On Earth Day.

6. I'm finally finishing books that I started last summer. Actually, I've finished both books that I started last summer. I started two more books, which I'm hoping to finish by this summer.